"Amazing" Adventures in Babysitting

I've had great, good and bad babysitters. The great ones are few and far between, and the bad outweigh the good.

Last night, Snark and I went out with friends. I had a girl, that my friend really liked, babysit. I admit, I was impressed with her manners and sweet demeanor. That is what sold my friend also. She has two boys and she was impressed that this girl was firm and played with the kids when she came to sit for her.

I called during the night and she said the girls were doing great. That made us feel good and we enjoyed the rest of our night. I paid her and dropped her home. She thanked me and said she would love to sit for us anytime and that our kids were "amazing". Okay, the use of the word "amazing" should have tipped me that something was off. I came home and found a sweet note saying the girls were "amazing". On a side note I noticed our Jeep was parked in the middle of the garage, as opposed to one side, like it is always parked. I was tired and just stuck it in the corner of my brain.

Snark and I were sitting in bed talking to the youngest about her night. We always make a point of asking about the sitter and how they behaved. The oldest was asleep at this time. The conversation went something like this. Remember we are tired at this point.

"Did you like her?"

"Yeah, she was nice. She said you were rich, mom."

"Huh?"

"Yeah, she went and tried on some of your make-up." Snark pops one eye open.

"She went in our bathroom." I ask, and give her some slack because she is 14 and into that stuff. But, that is my personal stuff and I use my make-up drawer as a holdall for money, jewelry and receipts.

"Yeah and your closet." Still willing to let this go, at this point. Snark at this time is wide awake and sitting up.

"We took a walk."

"Where?"

"Around the neighborhood. I also have a secret and I'm not supposed to tell you."

Now I am wide-awake and staring at my child.

"Good or bad secret?"

"She drove us in your car around the neighborhood. With the dog. And she said that if we told, she would never baby-sit for us again."

"Is this an April Fools joke?" Snark is hoping for the best.

"No, she told us she was taking us for a ride, and she said she would let me drive." Now this is my 7 year-old talking about the illegal driving that the 14 yr old sitter is doing in my car.

I woke my my 9 year old, who confirmed all this. Snark checked the car and the seat had been pushed up, and like I noted before the car was parked awkwardly with dog hair all over the interior.

I'm still in shock. Snark has a message in for the sitter's mother, because he would like to give her an earful about her sweet daughter endangering our kids, illegal driving, brand new vehicle, delving into personal items, etc....

I wish it had been an April Fools joke, but unfortunately it isn't.