Post Oscar

So yesterday was the first time in years that I have been alone watching the Oscars. Every year I throw an Oscar party. No ball-gowns just good food served with a side of sarcasm.

I persuaded Snark to pretend he wanted to watch it. He sat next to me until Clooney won and then left.

"If I wanted to see self-congratulatory blow-hards, I'd look in the mirror." was his parting shot as he escaped into the dungeon (his office).

Really, all I wanted to see was the dresses and hear who messed up on speeches. So I compiled a few highlights of the night.

Best dressed--I put Nicole Kidman down. She looked great. Normally I would have chosen Charlize Theron but it looked like she put a pillow on her shoulder. When the show was over I thought she was smart because she probably took a nap through some of those speeches.

Keira Knightley had a great dress color and a beautiful dress until you saw the poof at the end. Not into that. Also the bow in the back of her hair was stolen from my 8th grade Sadie Hawkins dress.

Did Naomi Watts get in a tussle with a tiger before she came?

When a song that has the line" it's hard out here for a pimp" wins we have a major breakdown in society. That said, it was a pretty catchy tune.

I hope nobody told Reese Witherspoon that the dress was vintage.

Now that I'm thinking about it, what is up with the trend of pairing pale with pale. Are you supposed to look ethereal if you are lily-white and your dress blends with your skin?

George Clooney is good-looking but really needed to take the Oscar and say thank-you. Nobody wanted to be reminded of Batman. Why didn't he bring up "Facts of Life" also?

Who knew Robert Altman had a heart!

I don't think Heath Ledger and Michelle Williams cared where they were, as long as they could keep staring at each other. I thought it was cute.

I love Phillip Seymour Hoffman. I have always thought he was a great actor. Anyone who watched Boogie Nights, Talented Mr. Ripley and that little known film State and Main knows this also.

Jack Nicholson's girlfriends always get younger! That was a joke because the girl was his daughter. Who knew he could spawn such a good-looking child.

Did Sandra Bullock have candy in her pockets?

Wallace and Grommit creators should have been handed a hunk of Wensleydale.

Jennifer Lopez is still married!!

Matt Dillon just gets better looking every time I see him.

Uma Thurman forgot to comb her hair.

Was something wrong with Lauren Bacall? Either she was drugged or drunk.

Helena Bonham Carter is the perfect corpse bride for Tim Burton. They both looked frightful.

Is it mean to mention that if Jennifer Garner had fallen that would have been the funniest moment of the whole show?

It was a very uneventful night. One thing I did realize was, watching it with a group is always more fun than cackling at your own thoughts during the show.